Are You Invisible?

I've talked with several Mother's recently about the "busy season" of Motherhood. There's so much to do! Sometimes we get so busy that we may fall prey to numerous temptations. Feeling sorry for ourselves, forgetting to take time for ourselves, forgetting our motivation for doing all the things we do as wives and Mothers.

I recently encountered a person who thought the sacrificing I am doing for my family and our traditional ways may be a problem. She expressed concern that I could fall into "losing myself" by not taking time for myself by shopping alone, pampering myself and getting away as much as she does as a single mother. Right now those are luxuries that I think are wonderful but are not always practical on a regular basis. I have priorities and they outrank some of the luxuries I enjoyed before having a family or at least their frequency. Don't get me wrong, I think there is a time and place for every woman to be pampered. Let's just remember our priorities and why we do what we do. We may feel invisible at times, but it will all be worth it as it blesses our family and glorifies our God.

For those of you who can relate, you may benefit from the this short video as much as I did.Thank you to my friend who shared it with me after the encounter I mentioned.

Keep up the good work you are doing in the lives of those in your family!

Monastic Motherhood

Have you ever felt like you've lost yourself in motherhood? Maybe you looked at the clock one day and saw it was noon when you realized you had changed dirty diapers, bathed children, made breakfast and lunch, cleaned up the messes from breakfast and lunch and dressed the children. But when you looked in the mirror you noticed you hadn't yet brushed your hair or teeth and your own stomach was growling? I've been there too and that's why I found the following so encouraging. It gives new perspective to the Christian Mom. Thanks to my friend Bonnie for sharing it with me.

Be blessed!


Carlo Carretto, one of the leading spiritual writers of the past half
century, lived for more than a dozen years as a hermit in the Sahara
Desert, alone with the Blessed Sacrament for company, milking a goat
for his food, and translating the Bible into the local Bedouin
language. He prayed for long hours by himself.

Returning to Italy one day to visit his mother, he came to a
startling realization. His mother, who for more than 30 years of her
life had been so busy raising a family that she scarcely ever had a
private minute for herself, was more contemplative than he was.

Carretto, though was careful to draw the right lesson from this. What
this taught was not that there was anything wrong with what he had
been doing living as a hermit. The lesson was rather that there was
something wonderfully right about what his mother was doing all these
years as she lived the interrupted life amid the noise and incessant
demands of small children. He had been in a monastery, but so had
she.

What is a monastery? A monastery is not so much a place set apart for
monks and nuns as it is a place set apart (period). It is also a
place to learn the value of powerlessness and a place to learn that
time is not ours, but God's.

Our home and our duties can, just like a monastery teach us those
things. For example, the mother who stays home with small children
experiences a very real withdrawal from the world. Her existence is
definitely monastic. Her tasks and preoccupations remove her from the
centers of power and social importance. And she feels it.

Moreover, the demands of young children also provide her with what
St. Bernard, one of the great architects of monasticism, called
the "monastic bell". All monasteries have a bell. Bernard, in
writing his rules for monasticism told his monks that whenever the
monastic bell rang they were to drop whatever they were doing and go
immediately to the particular activity (prayer, meals, work, study,
sleep) to which the bell was summoning them. He was adamant that they
respond immediately, stating that if they were writing a letter they
were to stop in mid-sentence when the bell rang. The idea in his mind
was that when the bell called, it called you to the next task and you
were to respond immediately, not because you want to, but because
it's time, it'sd God's time. For him, the monastic bell was intended
as a discipline to stretch the heart by always taking you beyond your
own agenda to God's agenda.

Hence, a mother rearing children, perhaps in a more privileged way
even than a professional contemplative is forced, almost against her
will, to constantly stretch her heart. For years, while rearing
children, her time is never her own, her own needs have to be kept in
second place and every time she turns around a hand is reaching out
and demanding something. She hears the monastic bell many times
during the day and she has to drop things in mid-sentence and
respond, not because she wants to, but because it's time for that
activity and time isn't her time, but God's time.

The rest of us experience the monastic bell each morning when our
alarm clock rings and we get out of bed and ready ourselves for the
day, not because we want to, but because it's time. Response to duty
can be monastic prayer, a needy hand can be a monastic bell, and
working without status and power can constitute a withdrawal into a
monastery where God can meet us. The domestic can be the monastic.

By Fr. Ron Rolheiser, OMI, Seattle, WA

The Catholic Northwest
Progress, Jan. 18, 2001.

Curious about Oprah's Spiritual Perspective?

"Do you watch Oprah?" This has often been a question that when posed to me brings anxiety. The truth? Yes, I watch Oprah on occasion. I enjoy her engaging personality and celebrity guests. I also detest some of her shows topics and her perspectives that don't coincide with a true christian perspective. Granted, these unbiblical topics and perspectives would bother me coming from any media source, but they trouble me more particularly when they come from Oprah because she often identifies herself as a Christian believer.

Therefore I am left with anxiety when I am approached with the question, "Do you watch Oprah?" I have been looked down on by fellow believers when I confess that, "Yes, I do." It's also been a source for conversation with non-believers and an avenue to share my faith. I've even been known for sending an email to Oprah explaining my frustation with how she contradicts herself from one show to another based on her guest and for not appreciating the value of marriage.

Oprah's show has brought me a lot of laughs, entertainment and cause for reflection. I still have a conviction about watching her show blindly however and I want to encourage others that if you choose to watch her show that you do so with a filter. Not everything on Oprah should be considered safe and as we approach all of life's matters we need to do so with a biblical perspective.

I'll never forget the christian philosophy professor who allowed us to watch an episode of Friends in class as long as we played, "Spot the Sin." That simple lesson sticks with me today as I am bombarded with media influences.

For a more in depth look at Oprah's spiritual perspective, you may find this article as interesting as I have. Remember to think critically.

Want to Write...

Baby crying. Gotta pick the baby. He comes first. Sure miss writing. Be back soon...I hope! :) God bless.

I love being a Mommy. Thank you God. Please help me to soak in every moment...even when I'm tempted to be impatient or long for something less important than the gifts of Jackson and Abigail that you have given to me to hold. I am blessed and thankful.

Obedience

Obedience seems to be a theme at our house this days. I wish I could say it's because we're excelling at it, but I'm afraid that's not been the case. We're working at it though and it's always a priority.

I am working at it myself in relation to my personal devotions. I woke up early yesterday in an attempt to try a new routine in which I would have my quiet times before the children awoke. Besides yawning and prying my eyes open, it was a very wonderful time with the Lord. The rest of the day was EXHAUSTING! I was falling asleep by afternoon while holding Jackson. I think I'm going to have to postpone my plan for rising early until Jackson begins sleeping through the night. But I know I need to obey God's instruction to be in the word and a routine is key.

My two year old Abigail is struggling as well. She is beginning to test her parents boundaries in nearly every way. The sweet little girl who used to say, "Yes, Mommy." Now shouts, "No!" Where did my angel go and who is this mean spirit inside her? As I give her time outs and explain consequences to sin, I am reminded of the importance of obedience at every stage of life. It never changes does it? We will always benefit when we follow our Father's commands and obey.

For bedtime tonight I think I will be singing, Trust and Obey. Not just for Abigail, but for me too.

Ahhhh....nap time

The beauty of silence. Nothing but the typing of the keys can be heard in our home right now. This just doesn't happen often.

Abigail (2) and Jackson (2 months) are down for their naps. I feel so accomplished!

I was talking with a girlfriend about the joys and sacrifices of stay-at-home motherhood. It's a temporary sacrifice in identity when you have a history of being known for your professional role in the work force. No longer are you nurse, lawyer, teacher, etc. No more meetings, luncheons, or seminars. Instead you wear the title of full time Mom all day long.

Sure these can be difficult sacrifices, but in the long term we both agreed how worthwhile they are to us. There is no place I would rather be and no one I would rather have caring for my child than me. It is a gift and a blessing that I am given this time with my children. They will only be young for such a short time. They are worth every investment I can make. I realize not everyone has this option and I aim to see it as a precious gift everyday I wake up for work...at home.

By the way, this is not an insult to the working women. I still work on a limited part time basis myself. We all do what we have to do...and to an extent what we want to do. I do encourage my friends to try it out though. If it means cutting your budget to make things work it's worth a try. Being a Stay-at-home Mom may not be for everyone, but it's the opportunity of a lifetime.

And in what other profession can you celebrate nap time?